CHANGING

I maintain that I must have once had a relationship with “that man Murphy” a relationship ,mind you, that must have gone sour because I can honestly not think of any other reason for a person to begrudge me so maliciously.
You see a few days ago I was reaching the end of my rapidly fraying rope, I felt like I was drowning and in accordance I posted a very strongly worded bitch fit to express to my very minute reader base that I felt like utter crap and I needed someone to tell me that its okay and remind me that this little pitfall is a ditch in comparison to some of the mighty sinkholes I have talked my way out of.
I have decided to not remove that ill advised rant from this documentation of my pregnancy, arguing that, contrary to popular believe, I am not that far removed from the normal 2x chromosome baring homosapian and if I have days like these other preggies have them too and somewhere there should be someone telling these poor sods that its quite normal to despise your life from time to time.
(Dear reader if you do decide to hate your life please do so responsibly)
Damn I’ve lost my train of thought…….
Oh yes. As I was going to say in my very long winded explanation of something mind numbingly simple…..
This post however served a duel purpose in that it proved to me that my little thingy has inherited its daddies good luck gene.
Not only did the whole financial mess take a positive turn after the post but something very strange happened.
An old friend whom I have not spoken to in a year tract my blog down and read it.
Refreshing as it is to hear that there are still people out there who are into the kind of self fladulating behavior that would prompt one to sit through my over descriptive monologs, I Still came close to swallowing my tongue when she phoned.
In a state of utter shock we met for coffee and my friend then proceeded to hand me the subject for my next post on a silver platter.
(And you thought this was the post)
“I remember” she said, and I flinched as I tend to do when people start sentences like that lately. “You used to say that you would never have children”.
I smiled and tried to pan my current pregnant state off to fate having decided otherwise.
The fact of the matter however was that she was quite right about my past convictions and admittedly I had mentioned that I was waiting for menopause before I decided to have kids.
This got me thinking, and after about five seconds of quite contemplation (I can only manage five seconds at a time) I realized that practically every single one of my convictions have been changed by the abrupt arrival of the Thingy into my life.
Pre-pregnancy I professed that I would take every possible step to have a pain free birth and now I advocate natural birth.
I was convinced that hospitals were the place to be and yet today I am making plans to convince gene that a home birth would be better.
Don’t even get me started on the breast feeding thing.
But I think the most markable change is the fact that I am bursting at the seems with excitement at the prospect of becoming a mom.
How weird is that.
Next thing you know Ill want to get married, luckily I know that the scheduled falling of the sky will prevent this lunacy from coming to fruition… but still.

Eugene is no exception to the matter. The man has become a walking talking baby catalog, as he merrily goes on his way dealing with this as he does with any momentous occasion in his life.
By buying gadgets.
Luckily for him Babies come with lots of gadgets and my man has been having sleepless nights fantasizing about his plans to make our kid the most wired up baby in the history of man kind.
He has also adopted that far away contemplative look you used to see superman wearing as he gazes into the sunset and reflects on how to change world.
It seems that while a woman grows to the size of an oil tanker during pregnancy men change in their own way and suddenly shoulder the responsibility of changing the world to a place fit to house the fruit of his loins.
He will stop using bad language and start smoking outside, he’ll chastise you about the way you drive and the safety of what you drive.
He’ll start reading the labels on food stuffs to check for led paint, melamine and whatever ells the Chinese are poisoning our food with.
Dad’s to be walk around the garden plotting out construction sites for jungle gyms and tree houses.
He becomes concerned with the swimming pool gate that doesn’t lock and starts training three boisterous pit bulls to play softly.
I swear my dogs are the only dogs in the world that adjust their behavior the moment the word baby is mentioned.
He becomes a decorator and handy man, and gives me disapproving looks every time I forget about the child proving and almost rip the cupboard door off its hinges.

And every week and every day that goes by while you curse things like stretch marks, bathplug nipples and the cost of baby crap you realize that what they say in those cliché magazines is true.
The moment you fall pregnant the you that you knew dies and you start from scratch because everything changes, its like being a teenager all over again.
And just when you think you’ve come to terms with pregnant you, you have to start again and meet mommy you.
How daunting
YAY FOR ME!